Monday, July 28, 2008

a pondering supplement

I realized after I wrote this post that I was being far too vague. And vagaries do nothing for good writing, as any of us who have taught writing know.

To be concise and specific, the custody agreement gives Banana mére four weeks of the summer. We agreed that trading off weeks made more sense than doing big blocks of time. This is the first time we've really been off the regular schedule in close to a year and a half. The disruption to my schedule and my inner well-being is surprising. What has been so shocking is the extent to which I rely on routines and schedules—Banana at school at a certain time, supper needing to be on the table, dishes needing to be done—to keep my peace of mind intact.

What amazes me sometimes is that it can take so long to know oneself.